‘I’ve fallen in love with my husband’s girlfriend’

When Sara Creighton learned that her husband Ryan had forged a close friendship with another woman called Kate, she’d have been forgiven for questioning her marriage.

But remarkably, despite Ryan admitting he was developing feelings for his new friend, trusting Sara gave the pair her blessing.

And their unusual set-up got more complicated when Sara realised after meeting Kate that she also fancied her.

Now, the lovebirds are living as a “throuple” – with Kate, 31, Sara, 34, and Ryan in a loving relationship together, enjoying date nights and threesomes.

Artist Sara says, “Before I met Kate, I didn’t even know it was possible for three people to be in a relationship, but we all love each other so much and it just works.

“We all have time alone with each other each week – Ryan and I have time together separately, as do Kate and Ryan and Kate and I, but we also enjoy sex as a threesome in mine and Ryan’s king-size bed. We know it’s unusual, but it works for us.”

Sara and Ryan, a ju-jitsu instructor, met at school when they were just teenagers, but they didn’t become a couple until 2011.

Sara says, “We lost touch and it wasn’t until we bumped into each other at a friend’s wedding years later that we reconnected.

“He’s very good-looking and I’d always fancied him, so I was delighted when we started dating.

“We both loved hiking and visiting art museums. Ryan was always so romantic, surprising me with gifts like my favourite vinyl records and chocolate.”

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The couple married in October 2017 and bought their first house together in Florida, USA. Sara says, “We quickly settled into the area and focused on decorating our new house. Ryan found a local gym and joined ju-jitsu classes, while I signed up to yoga.” One month later, Sara was pleased when Ryan began to make friends at his ju-jitsu class.

She says, “Ryan would talk about a woman called Kate he’d met, saying she was really funny and intelligent and how much I’d get on with her. I was glad for him as he’s very sociable. I trusted him 100 per cent so didn’t feel jealous. Our relationship was happy, solid and very loving. I didn’t have any reason to worry.”

Six months later, in August 2019, Ryan and Sara went to a friend’s party, where Sara met Kate for the first time.

Sara says, “We got on instantly and I was surprised that I noticed how beautiful she was – I’d never been attracted to a woman before, so I just put it to the back of my mind.”

Ryan and Sara began to hang out with Kate more, but their friendship started to get more complicated.

Sara says, “When Kate and Ryan looked at each other, I couldn’t help but notice a spark between them and, weirdly, I felt happy for them. I think a part of me knew that I maybe had feelings for Kate, too – I was sure there was something between us as well – but I kept it to myself. I’d never admitted to myself before that I might be bisexual.”

One night, Sara decided to talk to Ryan about his friendship with Kate. She says, “I told Ryan I thought there was something going on between them, and that I was OK if he wanted to explore that as long as he was open and honest with me. I didn’t want to stand in their way if they had something special.

“Ryan was stunned and confused, but he admitted that he did care for her as more than a friend.”A few days later, Ryan came home and told Sara he and Kate had kissed.

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She says, “It might sound surprising, but all I felt was jealousy – not of Kate, but of Ryan, because I wanted to kiss her, too!”Sara began researching open relationships, and learned about polyamory – when people fall in love with more than one person.

She says, “I was learning more about ethical non-monogamy, while also realising that I had feelings for Kate, too. I wondered if it was something that could work for us.”

Then, one night, in October 2019, Sara came clean to Ryan.

She says, “I told him I thought I had feelings for Kate and that I knew I was bisexual. I said I thought we were all falling in love together – and he completely agreed – so I knew I needed to talk to Kate about it.”

The trio had grown so close that when Sara and Ryan renewed their wedding vows in their garden on their anniversary – something Sara had wanted to do for a while – they asked Kate to be the officiant. Sara says, “I trusted Kate just like I trusted Ryan, and we’d formed such a special bond – it just felt right.

“That night, I told her I knew there was something special between them and I fully supported it, that I also had feelings for her too, and I thought I was in love with her and I’d like to see where it went.

“Thankfully, she felt the same, but had felt nervous saying it as she was worried about ‘ruining’ what Ryan and I had. It was then that we kissed for the first time. Ryan had seen what was going on, came over and we all hugged.”

After a few months of dating, they had sex for the first time together.

Sara says, “We waited so we could all get STI check-ups as it’s so important to be safe. We shared a three-way kiss, which was cool.

“It felt awkward at first, as I’d never been with a woman before, but we took it slowly and it was wild – we were all over each other! It was amazing, and the best of both worlds. I felt very loved and wanted.”

Since then, Ryan, Kate and Sara have split their time between each other’s homes, spending on average one night alone with each other a week, and the rest of the nights all sharing Ryan and Sara’s king-size bed.

Sara says, “Communication is key and we’ve set some ground rules. For example, if one of us isn’t in the mood for sex but the other two are, they need to go somewhere else so it isn’t awkward for the third person, and it’s really important that if someone feels left out, we all talk about it.”

Unfortunately, Ryan and Sara’s families took the news with mixed reactions.

Sara says, “While Ryan’s family were supportive, mine struggled to understand how you could be in love with more than one person – my sister and I aren’t as close as we were before. It’s been hard, but I knew it would be difficult for people to understand.”

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Now, the three are thinking about their plans for the future.

Sara adds, “We’ve talked about children but we don’t have any plans to have babies yet. If we did, we’d raise them as a unit of three. In the future, I’d love it if we all moved in together.

“I never thought I’d be in a polyamorous relationship – I’ve fallen in love with my husband’s girlfriend, but it feels so right and I have never felt so loved.”

Ryan says, “When I first met Kate in class, my first thought was how much I thought she’d get along with my wife, Sara. I found Kate so attractive but I kept suppressing my feelings. When Sara noticed it and told me to go for it, I was shocked and relieved. Now, I couldn’t be happier. It bothers me that some people – usually male friends or acquaintances – only talk about my relationship in a sexual way, but it’s so much more than that. We’re in love.”

Kate says, “I immediately felt a connection with Ryan. But I soon discovered he was married and I never wanted to get in the way of that. Then, one day,

Ryan kissed me and my first question was if Sara was OK with it. To my relief, she’d given her blessing.

“Not long after, I couldn’t believe it, but Sara and I fell for each other too. I love being in a relationship with Ryan and Sara. I adore both of them.”