What in the glistening vajazzle is going on in Essex right now? We know drama, feuds and fallouts is pretty custom on the show 33 series in, but even we're struggling to keep up with TOWIE at the moment.
On top of the more obvious feuds like Ella Rae Wise x Harry Derbidge and Elma Pazar x Jodie Wells, there are two feuds that we apparently have totally missed. Bad journalism on our part; but to be fair to us, these feuds haven't really played out on screen yet, but we do try and make a living out of knowing this stuff before the general public, so slap wrists for us.
Anyway, the first mysterious feud is the one between Junaid Ahmed and Saffron Lempriere, which was briefly touched upon in the most recent episode of the ITVBe series (and to be fair, Junaid is trying to resolve things with Saffron along with the other two million people living in Essex).
The second brewing feud has been made public knowledge courtesy of newcomer Freddie Bentley.
Now, we knew Ella's bestie/former The Circle star knew a fair few of the cast prior to signing his ITV contract, but according to Freddie, Harry Derbidge is "downplaying" their friendship and history (sorry, what?) and has been "badmouthing" the series newcomer, which of course Freddie has found out about ('cause Essex).
Freddie recently revealed, "I’ve also known the likes of Harry for over ten years, although we have not been close. I used to work for him in Harry’s World – his little shop.
We're yet to see the boys share a scene on the show, but according to Freddie, Harry has been making out that they hardly know each other. Awks.
Freddie told OK!, "Harry downplayed our relationship with the whole cast.
"I do think he was a bit shocked I came on because I had to keep it a secret, but I don’t owe him that. Two weeks before he went to Bali he was round at mine having a takeaway, but he made out to everyone we didn’t have a friendship. That is yet to be tackled on the show but it will be. We’ve got a friendship but it is very distant, I think he feels threatened by another gay guy joining the show."
Freddie concluded, "I’m no wallflower and I’m a big character and I think it throws people. I am all about everyone winning so it is a shame because we could have had an amazing friendship, but I have heard he has been badmouthing me."
So what does Freddie make of Harry's feud with Ella over Dan Edgar and Girl Band? Naturally, he's not all that impressed and is backing his girly girl all the way. But according to Freddie, Harry has been adding fuel to the fire by saying things about him to Ella...
He revealed, "I think it was a real shame. Anyone could have mentioned about Ella and Dan but he went out of his way to do it. That’s the shame of it all and I don’t know if it will go back to what it was. Trust needs to be rebuilt and strengthened. But what hasn’t helped is Harry saying things about me to Ella. It wouldn’t be TOWIE without the drama."
We have to say, these are some accusations right here, and we patiently await Harry's passive aggressive meme share.
In the future, if it helps you keep up, just assume everyone is always feuding with everyone else on the show – yep, even Amy Childs' twins are at each other (that's a joke) – otherwise you end up with a TOWIE migraine like the one we're nursing right now trying to piece this latest row together.