Should new mums be more sensitive when sharing their experiences?

Closer speaks with two celebrity mums who have differing views on whether these so-called “smug mums” should think before sharing their thoughts on social media

chloe goodman casey batchelor

by Daisy McLure |
Updated on

There has been a wave of celebrity mums, including former TOWIE star Kate Ferdinand and radio presenter Kate Lawler, who have spoken up about feeling low, in both their mood and self-esteem, post-birth. And for many new mothers who have been struggling with lockdown, feeling isolated and lacking any motivation to “snap back” into shape, their honest approach has been reassuring, and relatable.

But a fresh debate was sparked, when new mum, TV presenter Laura Whitmore, who gave birth to a daughter – whose name has not yet been revealed – last month, took to Instagram to share a positive post.

“I’ve been told I won’t be able to leave the house and should feel s--t. But I actually feel the best I’ve ever felt and the happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life. And maybe feel a bit guilty for feeling good as I’ve been told I shouldn’t,” Laura wrote.

“But I’ve created something incredible. I had a positive birth with thankfully no complications and a baby that LOVES the boob (and jaysus those boobs are looking good!)”

Laura, 35, asked others not to compare her journey to their own, and her fans praised her positive approach.

But others couldn’t help but note that “not everyone has the same experience”, and with “comparison culture” – the habit of scanning social media and comparing your life to the snippets of other people’s lives – on the rise, it’s been claimed that these posts could even be harmful.

Here, Closer speaks with two celebrity mums who have differing views on whether these so-called “smug mums” should think before sharing their thoughts on social media.

Casey Batchelor: ‘Seeing boastful posts would have depressed me after my birth’

Celebrity Big Brother star Casey Batchelor, 36, is mum to daughters Florence, two, and one-year-old Sadie, and is expecting her third daughter this summer. She believes glowing reports of early motherhood could be damaging and says mothers need to be mindful of other new mums at such a vulnerable time.

Casey says, “It’s great that new mums have positive and happy birthing and parenting experiences, but for most first-time mums, feeling the best they’ve ever felt seems a very distant hope. In my own experience, after my first birth, I was so ill I couldn’t stand up for two weeks. I had been cut and stitched, I was bleeding heavily and I cried so much about how my body had changed.

“If I had seen another mum’s post about how brilliant they were feeling at the time, I’d have felt even more depressed and asked myself, ‘Why don’t I feel that way? Am I wrong to be feeling how I’m feeling?’

“Of course, I would want to be positive towards another mother, and I don’t want to bash any one, but it takes an incredibly strong person not to feel resentful and not to compare themselves.

“For women who have given birth just before and during the pandemic, a lot of those new mothers will be feeling low and isolated, or could be single mums without support.

“Women should celebrate having a positive birth, which is incredible, but I think it’s important to show solidarity with the women who aren’t feeling that way by extending sympathy, or even just by recognising that everyone is different.

“I feel that if you have a large following, like Laura, it’s so important to be mindful of how others are feeling. The best message for new mums is just to take care of themselves, and that it’s OK not to feel on top of the world.”

Chloe Goodman: ‘It’s barbaric to knock mothers for their success stories’

Chloe Goodman, 27, whose daughter Isla is nearly one, says mums shouldn’t feel bad about feeling great and shouldn’t shoulder the blame for other people’s bad experiences.

The Ex On The Beach star says, “It really bothers me that new mums can’t share their journeys into motherhood if they have been positive. Why would we look at a post like Laura’s and think she’s gloating? She is sharing her own journey – if you don’t want to see it, then don’t look.

“It’s nice when pregnancy, birth and parenting have gone so well for someone, especially a first-time mum. I don’t think they should be torn down or trolled for celebrating their success stories – it’s barbaric!”

Check out: 31 of Celebrity Big Brother's most outrageous moments EVER

Gallery

Celebrity Big Brother's most outrageous moments SLIDER

roxanne pallett emmerdale1 of 31
CREDIT: Channel 5

Roxanne Pallett accused Ryan Thomas of punching her

When Roxanne Pallett and Ryan Thomas were playing fighting no one was quite prepared when the Emmerdale actress claimed that he punched her hard in the ribs. She was quick to tell the rest of the housemates, ask Big Brother why Ryan wasn't removed from the house and branded him 'a liar', 'manipulative' and 'calculating'. During an eviction the CBB crowd were chanting for Roxanne to leave and shortly after she quit the show.That didn't stop the nation from being furious and Ofcom received over 11,000 complaints. She's since apologised for her actions but Ryan's brother Adam has slammed her apology and so has the Corrie star's girlfriend Lucy Mecklenburgh.

Kim loses her rag2 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Kim Woodburn's explosive row

Security entered the house in 2017 to escort Kim Woodburn out, following an explosive row with her housemates.

Biggins gets the boot3 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Christopher Biggins' shocking removal

In 2016, Christopher Biggins was removed from the house after making shocking homophobic and anti-Semitic comments.

What happens in the bathroom doesn't stay in the bathroom...4 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Stephen Bear and Chloe Khan's bathroom saga

In 2016, Stephen told Chloe he wanted to "f**k her in the bathroom" while the pair got intimate after locking themselves in the bathroom... the noises were unbearable!

Uh oh Bear...5 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Stephen Bear's love affair

In 2016, Stephen Bear's girlfriend entered the house to confront him after he cheated with housemate Chloe Khan.

GC'S diva antics6 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Gemma Collins' controversial decision

In 2016, Gemma Collins chose to have a professional blow dry at the expense of her fellow housemates losing out on hot water and the use of hair appliances for the day.

Mad Megs7 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Megan McKenna's meltdown

In 2016, Megan McKenna's drunken meltdown got her removed from the house by security.

CBB love affair8 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Stephanie and Jeremy's romance

In 2016, Stephanie Davis publicly cheated with Jeremy McConnell, while her boyfriend tuned in to watch every night... awkward.

DAVID'S DEAD9 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

'David's Dead' confusion

In 2016, Tiffany Pollard was hysterical after mishearing Angie Bowie's news that her husband David Bowie had died, and mistaking him for her fellow housemate David Gest.

Dirty laundry humiliation10 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Stephanie Davis' knickers humiliation

In 2016, John Partridge, Christopher Maloney and Darren Day came across Stephanie's dirty underwear and publicly mocked her stains, referring to them as "pigeon s--t".

Winston clashes with the house11 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Winston McKenzie's homophobic slur

In 2016, housemates were left stunned as Winston McKenzie's homophobic views were exposed in a task, as he compared gay adoption to "child abuse".

Geordie Shore meets TOWIE12 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Lewis Bloor and Marnie Simpson's shower scene

In 2016, Marnie Simpson and Lewis Bloor enjoyed a naked romp in the showers... Nice.

The Perez Show13 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Perez Hilton's sexual threats

Perez Hilton repeatedly tells Calum Best he'd "shove his huge dk up your ae" during a heated row in 2015.

Perez vs. Katie14 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Perez Hilton harassing Katie Hopkins

During their daily bust-ups in 2015, Perez Hilton tried to lick Katie Hopkins whilst singing "lick it good, suck this d**k just like you should"... charming.

Banana-gate15 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Alicia Douvall banana-gate

In 2015, Alicia Douvall was left in tears after housemates caught her stealing bananas and hiding them under her bed... there's worse sins!

N-word bombshell16 of 31
CREDIT: BBC

Ken Morley's racist slur

Ken Morley was removed from the house in 2015 for using the 'n-word' in a heated discussion with Alexander O'Neal.

The love triangle drama17 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Lee Ryan, Casey Batchelor and Jasmine Waltz's love triangle

Following her on-screen romance with Lee Ryan, Jasmine Waltz re-entered the house after he quickly moved on to fellow housemate Casey Bachelor in 2014.

Leslie and Frenchy come to blows18 of 31

Leslie Jordan's row with Frenchy

In 2014, Leslie Jordan lost his cool with Frenchy after she cut up his underwear, calling her "white trash" and a "stinking French s**t!"

Na Na Neigh!19 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Dappy's raunchy bathroom scene

Dappy 'windmilled' after jumping in the pool with Luisa in 2014.

CBB villains Speidi20 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Spencer and Heidi Pratt's villainous antics

In 2013, Spencer and Heidi Pratt prevented housemate Claire Richards from getting a letter from her children... AND celebrated it.

Lauren takes a tumble21 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Lauren Harries falling over 24/7

Lauren Harries constantly tripped over in 2013. How?!

Karissa was not impressed...22 of 31

Denise Welch's drunken antics

In 2012, Karissa Shannon threatened to leave and sue the show as a drunken Denise Welch jokingly pulled down her trousers and exposed her bum.

Frankie doesn't go to Hollywood23 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Frankie Cocozza and Nicola Maclean get steamy in the hot tub

Frankie Cocozza and Nicola Maclean get steamy in the hot tub in 2012.

Julie takes a trip to the fruitbowl24 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Julie Goodyear's banana scene

Julie Goodyear got a little too personal with a banana in 2012.

Jedward in their pants25 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Jedward get vajazzled

Jedward got vajazzled by Amy Childs in 2011... not something you want to see every day.

Naked man alert!26 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Alex Reid's beauty regime

Alex Reid got a fake tan in the buff in 2010.

Verne Troyer drink driving27 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Verne Troyer's drunken collision

Verne Troyer had a head-on collision with the Diary Room after getting a bit tipsy in 2009.

Poppadomgate28 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Jade Goody vs. Shilpa Shetty

Jade vs Shilpa in 2007 led to one of the most controversial CBB moments EVER and to Jade's silent eviction from the house.

And the award for Politician of the Year goes to...29 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

George Galloway's cat incident

George Galloway pretended to be a pussy-cat in 2006. A nation shuddered.

Heeeeeeere's Jackie!30 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Jackie Stallone's shock arrival

Jackie Stallone's shock arrival in the house in 2003 was accompanied by the immortal line: 'Yeaaaah, Jaaaackie!'

Feltz Meltz31 of 31
CREDIT: CBB

Vanessa Feltz tragic meltdown

In the first ever CBB in 2001 Vanessa Feltz had a meltdown and scrawled posh words all over a table.

WATCH: ‘I was the queen of getting told off’: Paige and Finn expose their Love Island Secrets

READ MORE

Is it ever acceptable to criticise someone's weight?

10 ways to help your children LOVE their food

Controversial mum: ‘My sexy baby bump will make me thousands!’

She continued, “For me, some days I feel like Supermum and some days I’m barely keeping it together. I previously lost a child through a missed miscarriage and my pregnancy with Isla was really difficult as I had to have stitches so I could carry her, and I was banned from being intimate and having baths.

“There were lots of limitations and I struggled to bond with Isla for six months, but I would never look at somebody else and say, ‘Why me?’ I’d just think, ‘Oh, bad luck’ and just be happy I had a child. There are always people who are worse off.

“I was also worried about losing myself after becoming a mum, so seeing other women who are able to be mums and work, and who have found a great balance, is inspiring for me and other women.

“When I was pregnant so many people would tell me my life would be over. Yes, of course it’s hard, but it gets better! Instead of blaming people we’ve never met for how we feel, and dictating what they should post, we all need to appreciate and enjoy our own lives – and we’ve all certainly had enough doom and gloom this year!”

Just so you know, we may receive a commission or other compensation from the links on this website - read why you should trust us