I never orgasm from oral sex – I feel awkward and embarrassed. Do you have any tips on how I can enjoy it more?
Julia, by email
For most women, the embarrassment usually stems from fears over smell, feeling exposed when he’s up close and personal with such a private area of themselves or thinking their “bits” aren’t attractive. Truth is, a healthy vagina smells pleasant, most men find the natural odour a turn on and what we see as something weird looking, they see as massively arousing.
Penises and testicles also look pretty strange if you think about it! Feeling awkward suggests you’ve had a strict upbringing where you’ve been taught to think of sex as “dirty” or “unladylike.”
The way to fix this is to think about where these thoughts have come from and challenge them. The more comfortable you are with your body, the more likely you are to relax into orgasm.