Man talk with Closer’s Andrew Hartley: A weighty issue

Get the male perspective and the truth about what men really think with Closer’s Andrew Hartley

mark-and-michelle

by Closer staff |
Published on

Finding true love is a wonderful thing. But, apparently, that’s not all you gain. In fact, women now complain that being in a committed relationship is the biggest single reason they put on weight, with researchers finding almost two thirds of women gain over a stone within months of starting a new romance.

Even svelte Michelle Keegan claims romantic nights in with Mark Wright scoffing takeaways has led her to put on a few pounds, saying: “Girls do that when they’re with boyfriends, don’t they?”

Hang on – don’t blame us, love! Here’s the science. Men need more calories, hence we need to eat more than you. But, during the dishing up process, there’s a malfunction. Because the magnificent mountains of chips or curry on our plate are somehow exactly matched by what’s 
on your plate. Weird, huh?

The solution? Whoever dishes up should serve a huge portion for the man of the house, and something more modest (by at least 500 calories) for the lady. But who am I kidding? When you’ve finished your miniature meal, you’ll just start nicking chips off our plates, won’t you? Still, at least that’ll help us drop some of the extra 2st we’ve put on...

Man myths

#21 Men with beards tend to be lazy 
and untidy

Are you joking? Have you any idea how much upkeep a beard requires? I’ve rocked the facial hair thing twice in my life, and the only reason I don’t any more is the bloody hard work behind it. Trimming, shampooing, conditioning, trimming again, shaping, scratching, picking bits of dinner out of it…

Of course, I’m talking about a well-groomed beard. If he’s wearing something that wouldn’t look out of place in Fleetwood Mac, well, he probably is a bit of a tramp at home.

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