Is your gay best friend stopping you from finding a man?

Being dragged to yet another gay bar, I realised something was not quite right. Paul had met three potential suitors in the last week, and all I had added to my phonebook were more GBFs (Gay Best Friends).


by Jessica Anais Rach |
Published on

To be fair, I wasn’t actually looking at the time, but realistic eye-candy does add more to a night out, than constantly being elbowed aside in a haze of excitable (and inaccessible) men.

Insisting we went to a straight bar to ‘even the score’, my plans were quickly brought to a halt when the bartender asked ‘Rum and coke for the boyfriend too?’.


So I decided on a Paul-ban. Much to his anger –and my guilt- our nights were now confined to (girly) nights in, and my eye-candy craving was satisfied on multiple girl’s nights out.

But for women on a serious man-hunt, is this GBF ‘cock-block’ theory correct?

Columnist Rowan Pelling states: ‘The truth is you’ve got to start treating your gay friends more like good female mates. Apart from anything else, you need to spend more time in environments where you are likely to meet straight men.’

Some even go as far as to say that your GBF will set such impossibly high standards, that not only will no man match up to him, you will fall fruitlessly in love with him.

But look at Carrie Bradshaw and Stanford, Will and Grace, Victoria Beckham and Elton John- they seem to be doing just fine.

With all the mixed views on how a GBF can influence your love life, we compiled the 5 pros and cons- decide for yourself!


  • You can chase away creeps hitting on you by pretending he is your partner.

  • He won’t sugar-coat love life advice- he’ll give it to you straight.

  • You won’t get the oestrogen -fuelled girlfriend drama.

  • He can give you an insight to the man’s perplexing mind.

  • You can go shopping with him without your boyfriend getting jealous.


  • Potential suitors might think he is your partner.

  • He might be so great, you will (unsuccessfully) try to turn him straight.

  • You go to so many gay venues, that your only admirers will be gay girls.

  • He gets territorial and jealous if you pay attention to another (gay or straight) man.

  • No man lives up to his standards.

All of the above should not change a genuine friendship. Gay, straight or green- for me, Paul is here to stay- if he’ll still have me that is.

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