The American college student killed six and injured eight when he went on a hate-fuelled gun rampage in May near the University of California, Santa Barbara.
And now the close friend of the family's said he tried to help Eliot in the years before his death, suggesting ways he could meet women and telling him to get out there more.
'He seemed convinced that women hated him but he could never tell me why' said Dale, who is a screenwriter.
'I told him, "When you see a woman next time you're on campus and you like her hair or sunglasses, just pay her a compliment."'
'I told him, "It's a freebie, something in passing, you're not trying to make conversation. Keep walking, don't make long eye contact, just give the free compliment.'
But when Dale emailed Eliot a few weeks later to see how he was getting on, the response he got was: 'Why do I have to compliment them? Why don't they compliment me?'
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Dale added that he became increasingly frustrated with Eliot, who seemed to take no responsibility for his own social isolation.
'People did try to help him, he was getting support, but he was such a sad little character - whenever you saw him he was always unhappy.'
Other friends commented that they had never seen Eliot smile.
Read more: Survivors of gun violence share their stories.
Signing off his piece on the BBC World Service, Dale said he struggled trying to reconcile the love he had for Eliot over his short life, with the terrible actions he took - 'it just makes you so angry' he said.