Everyone’s been there; you KNOW you’re right, but in the heat of the moment, you just cannot think of an elegant way to win the argument and settle things once and for all.
But the experts over at Cornell University have revealed that the gift of the gab CAN be learnt, and you can win almost anyone over if you know the secret formula.
The Cornell researchers used the most viable source they could to gather just how people won people over in the midst of a lengthy debate: Reddit.
That’s right, they headed over to ChangeMyView on the social network site to see how those Persuasive Petes got it done.
From all the big topics (politics, religion) to smaller subjects (favourite sandwich fillers, best Friends character) researcher trailed through to see how commenters were won over. And here's what they came up with...
5 crucial steps to changing anyone's mind
1. Pick your opponents
OK, slight disclaimer. You can’t change everyone’s mind, because some people are too darn stubborn to even hear you out. So, firstly, you have to assess if your opponent has wiggle room.
Looking to someone’s language can help indicate this. Those who use ‘we’ instead of ‘I’ are more likely to be open minded, and language that is richer in adjectives, adverts and generally positive words were more likely to be flexi on their views.
2. Gain strength in numbers
The more people who sided against someone, the more likely they were to backtrack on their initial point
So next time your taking on an opponent, be sure to be surrounded by people you KNOW agree with your Star Wars theory, and you’ll up your chances of wining the others over.
3. Get the timing just right
Scrolling through Reddit threads, researchers found that those who got in their opposing opinions early were more likely to sway the original posters.
4. Keep calm and carry on
Ever heard that lack of intelligence drives anger? Well, there may be some truth in it, because those who used aggressive and anger-laced language were less likely to be persuasive, especially when they used trigger words to rile people up.
However, calm headed commenters using chilled language were more successful.
Exciting, not so much. Effective? Hell yeah.
5. Get specific
Just like we learned in school, you’ve just got to PEA all over it if you’re in to win. For those of us whose English lessons have become ancient history, that’s Point, Evidence, Analysis.
To win an argument, you need to put forward actual examples to prove your point. Winning arguments are filled with expressions like ‘for example,’ ‘for instance,’ and so on, researchers found.
If you really want to seal the deal, put that evidence right under their nose, just to cover all grounds.
What do you think about this so-called winning formula to winning any argument?
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