Man’s heartbreaking open letter goes viral: ‘My wife has been cheating on me for 10 years’

A man has posted a powerful open letter to Facebook after learning of his wife’s 10-year affair… and revealed why he blames himself

Man’s heartbreaking open letter goes viral: ‘My wife has been cheating on me for 10 years’

by Kayleigh Dray |
Published on

It is always easy to let work get in the way of life - or to spend your evenings on social media, rather than with your loved ones, after a tiring day.

But one man who did exactly that has now spoken out, in a desperate bid to warn others against making the same mistakes as him.

The emotional letter reads:

I need to get my life off my chest.

About me: I’m a 46-year-old banker and I have been living my whole life the opposite of how I wanted. All my dreams, my passion, gone. In a steady 9-7 job, 6 days a week. For 26 years.

I repeated chose the safe path for everything, which eventually changed who I was.

Today I found out that my wife has been cheating on me for the last 10 years. My son feels nothing for me. I realised I missed my father’s funeral for NOTHING.

*I didn’t complete my novel, travel the world, or help the homeless. *

All the things I thought I knew to be certain about myself when I was in my late teens and early twenties. If my younger self had met me today, I would have punched myself in the face.

Via Facebook
Via Facebook

He went on to explain that his job quickly became his life, only having time to eat dinner and sleep before heading back to the office again.

It ruined his sex life - and he couldn’t even remember the last time that he and his wife had made love.

The letter continues:

*Yesterday, my wife admitted to cheating on me for the last 10 years. *

10 years.

That seems like a long time, but I can’t comprehend it. It doesn’t even hurt.

She says it’s because I’ve changed, that I’m not the person I was. What have I been doing for the last 10 years?

Beside work, I can’t really say anything - not being a proper husband. Not being ME. Who am I? What happened to me?

I didn’t even ask for a divorce, or yell at her, or cry. I felt NOTHING. But now I can feel a tear as I write this. But not because my wife has been cheating on me - because I am now realising I have been dying inside.

Stock image

The devastated husband goes on to reveal that, when his mother called him to tell him that his father was dying, he was too busy with work to go and visit.

Realising too late his terrible mistake, he said:

WHAT WAS I THINKING? Rationalising everything, making excuses to put things off. Excuses. Procrastination. It all leads to one thing - nothing.

I rationalised that money was the most important thing. I now know that it definitely is not.

I regret doing nothing with my energy, when I had it. My passions. My youth. I regret letting my job take over my life.

I regret being an awful husband, a money-making machine. I regret not finishing my novel, not travelling the world. Not being emotionally there for my son. Being a damn emotionless wallet.

Via Facebook

He finished with a warning to all those who were reading his status:

*If you’re reading this, and you have your whole life aged of you, please don’t procrastinate. Don’t leave your dreams for later. *

Relish in your energy, your passions. Don’t stay on the internet with all your spare time (unless your passion needs it). Please, do something with your life while you’re young.

DO NOT settle down at 20. DO NOT forget your friends, your family, or yourself.

DO NOT waste your life, your ambitions, like I did mine.

Do not be like me.

**Were you moved by this man’s letter? Can you relate to anything he has said?

Share your thoughts via the comments box below now.**

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