It’s been kicking off in TOWIE land, and all because Essex babe Chloe Sims has been secretly dating co-star Mario Falcone for an entire month (and nobody even had a clue!).
The issue, you ask? Mario once had a romantic tryst with Chloe’s best pal, Lauren Pope. Now Lauren is refusing to speak to Chloe, and Chloe is refusing to understand why Lauren is so upset, and it’s all got a bit ugly…
This brings us to ask- is it ever okay to date your friend’s ex?
The argument FOR dating a pal’s ex-boyfriend is often loosely based on the logic that the bloke is no longer with your mate, he is an ex-boyfriend rather than an actual boyfriend- and if you don’t have feelings for him anymore then why is it a big deal?
Well, the truth is that it’s never going to be smooth sailing to start dating your friend’s ex-boyfriend, for many reasons…
First of all, there is a reason why your friend is not dating him. Think about it. If he treated her badly or cheated on her then it’s always going to be better idea to steer clear of him.
Remember when you comforted your poor friend after he broke her heart and how much she appreciated having you there to nurse her through the pain? Chances are she will not return the favour if you decide to go there with her ex.
Even if things ended amicably between your pal and her ex, how can you be sure it won’t become awkward between you two once you start developing feelings for him and potentially comparing yourself to her?
Another important reason why you should probably opt out of that date with your mate’s ex is that feelings never TRULY go away.
They might no longer be in love, but they’ll always share a relationship that you’ll never be a part of: are you willing to compete with their memories every day of your relationship?
Lastly, lets think about a theoretical situation where your best friend pretends to be okay with the whole situation and invites you and your new boyfriend (i.e. her old boyfriend) round for dinner.Cue an awkward tense evening as you eat dinner through a web of incest, not dissimilar from Ross in ‘Friends’ when he invited ex-girlfriend Rachel and her new boyfriend/his best pal Joey round and insisted how ‘fine’ he was.
And do you have the right to be upset if your friend is choosing to hook up with your ex-boyfriend? YES OF COURSE YOU DO.
When you see your friend with your ex-boyfriend you can’t help but wonder: Did he fancy her all along?
Ultimately there’s a sense of disloyalty attached to a friend who chooses to date your ex. Should it come down to it, would your bestie ultimately choose a man over your friendship?
The truth is, dating a mate’s ex-boyfriend and expecting a friendship to remain intact is completely naïve.
Sisters before misters, all the way ladies.