Would you agree with this?
Getting married can be one of the biggest and most important days of your life. But apparently there’s one key sign that could pre-empt whether or not you and your significant other will stay together.
While infidelity, finances, lack of intimacy and miscommunication have all previously been deemed the most common reasons that relationships don’t work out, experts are now warning that the biggest threat to a marriage is something else entirely.
Relationship expert Derek Harvey reveals that after seeing this crop up again and again over the last six years, he believes it’s the biggest indicator that your relationship might not make it.
Can you guess what it is?
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According to Harvey, it’s something we’ve all been guilty of in romantic relationships at some point in our lives – unmet expectations.
Derek spoke to Inspire More, and explained: “I have seen the pain and frustration that plays out from having unmet expectations, not just in marriage, but in all relationships.
“It’s a deadly venom that flows to the heart and wreaks havoc in relationships.”
Backing up his conclusion, another relationship coach James Preece told The Independent: “Unmet expectations are a huge relationship killer.
“People tend to enter marriages or long-term relationships expecting the other person to change their ways.
“They think that over time they’ll be able to mould them into someone else. This only leads to disappointment and anger.”
He suggests that if a couple really wants to make a go of things and leave these unmet expectations at the door, the best course of action is to simply try and accept your partner for who they are.
“The best way to handle unmet expectations is simply to work as a team,” he says.
“Set goals together and work towards them. Not only is that more fun, but you are much more likely to achieve them when someone is spurring you on.”
Have unmet expectations ever impacted your relationships? Let us know what you think on Facebook or Twitter
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How to make your marriage work: Advice from Closer psychologist Emma Kenny
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Work at your friendship – it’s what underpins your relationship and offers longevity.
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Tell each other what you need and want from your relationship.
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You’re not in a film so stop trying to emulate one. The Hollywood version of relationships where we “just know it’s right” is a fantasy.
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You might feel like you want to spend every minute together but make sure you see friends and carry on with the interests you had before you met him. A healthy relationship is a balanced one.
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Rushing into love can be a sign of low self-esteem. Ask yourself if you’re really compatible, or if you’re just enjoying feeling wanted.
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Resolve your issues as they appear rather than building up petty resentments, and focus on the positives too!
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Don’t compare your relationship to others’. Every relationship is individual with different circumstances.
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