You know you’re on a diet when…

This hilarious GIF article sums up the terrifying truths that every would-be dieter will know (NSFW)

diet

by Kayleigh Dray |
Published on

It's official; you've decided you're going on a diet

No, you're not happy about it.

So why are you dieting? Because of that non-existent roll of fat you can't stop obsessing over...

"LOOK AT MY FAT KNEES, DAMN IT!!!!"

And you're prepared to do anything to shift it

You are super serious about this fact.

Because there's a dress (there's always a dress) that you HAVE to wear in two months...

And, while it may not fit quite perfectly now, it's definitely going to by then. Because it has to.

But, you know, the diet starts tomorrow. Not, like, right now.

"Oh food, I'm going to miss you and your deliciousness"

Even if it WILL mean saying goodbye to some old friends...

It'll be okay… we promise.

You confidently declare to everyone that you're going to lose 3 pounds…

…usually as an explanation as to why you've ordered a side salad for dinner.

Everyone (most of all your mum) promptly tells you that you don't NEED to diet

"No, but seriously guys, I really want to lose three pounds..."

Then one person - one very stupid person - agrees that yeah, you could maybe stand to lose a pound or two

Silence fills the room.

Cue you getting just a teeny-weeny bit emotional

"EVERYONE THOUGHT I WAS FAT ALL THIS TIIIIIIIME!"

*(Erm, just as an FYI - they didn't.) *

*

But it's okay. It's okay. You're feeling motivated and ready for some series dieting action…

"COME AT ME, CARB-FREE SNACKS!"

Although you ARE feeling a little bit intimidated by all the diets out there

"Should I do the 5:2? Or the Juice Diet? Or, like, I dunno… Atkins? Is Atkins still a thing?"

And you're not exactly sure about the semantics of it all

No but seriously - is it?

But you sure know how to make a delicious, healthy smoothie…

Sigh.

And salad. You know how to make an amazing salad, right?

Sigh.

You're totally unbothered when your friends order dessert in front of you

Double sigh.

No, you aren't having major hunger-induced mood swings

Did we mention sigh?

And you don't fantasise about pizza, like, all the time

ALL THE SIGHS EVER!!!

And you aren't constantly left heartbroken by your newfound knowledge about food

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

But, eventually, you get into the swing of things

"Did I ever tell you that I frikkin love salad?"

You've got a newly-discovered love of fruit and veg

"Oh my gosh, it's one of my five-a-day? I love it!"

You understand the phrase 'all things in moderation'

But you're still happy to have a treat every now and then, obviously.

And you're happily working your way towards your target weight

"I'm feeling good, people. I'm feeling DAMN good!"

Yes, your friends mocked you for ordering the low-fat options at restaurants

"Blah blah blah"

And YES, there was the night you cracked and ate your own weight in chocolate

"DON'T LOOK AT ME!!!"

But it was all worthwhile to get into that dream dress…

"I look fabulous, darlings"

Or, y'know, maybe you ended up buying a different one because you decided that dieting wasn't for you

Repeat: "I look fabulous, darlings"

Either way, you're a hero!

As long as you're happy with yourself, that's all that matters.

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