EastEnders star Rakhee Thakrar on stillbirth: ‘There’s no instruction book for grief’

Rakhee Thakrar - who plays Shabnam Masood in EastEnders - has spoken out about the complicated grief process of stillbirth

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by Kayleigh Dray |
Published on

Viewers were left in tears as they watched Shabnam Masood (Rakhee Thakrar) and Kush Kazemi (Davood Ghadami) deliver their stillborn son, Zaair.

But, as any parent affected by stillbith will know, the story doesn’t end in the delivery room.

Speaking with The Huffington Post, Rakhee explained that, over the coming weeks, viewers are going to see how Shabnam and Kush’s behaviour will be affected by their grief.

While her character is choosing to bury her feelings and forge forward with her plans to adopt Jade, the daughter she abandoned as a baby, Kush will be handling things in a very different way.

And it will cause a great deal of friction between the couple.

"It’s such a complicated time, because their grief is still raw and everyone has their own way of dealing with it," she said.

"There’s no instruction book on how to deal with it, and what you’re seeing is people not quite connecting."

Rakhee went on to explain that Shabnam, as a bereaved mother, is finding it increasingly difficult to be around her best friend Stacey (Lacey Turner).

She explained: “We’ve seen them starting to become friends again, but she’s pregnant and for any bereaved mother that is extremely difficult.

“You see all the stages you should have gone through and, also, you’re willing for their baby to be OK.

You can’t help but think about what can go wrong in the world, so it’s difficult for her to be friends with Stacey… but I think Shabnam will push through that and force herself to be by her side and help with her pregnancy.”

Shabnam’s storyline, which was handled realistically, sensitively, and appropriately, was praised by viewers and stillbirth charities alike.

Rakhee, who worked closely with Sands as she prepared for the role, hopes that the storyline will remove some of the stigma surrounding stillbirth.

Speaking when the storyline was announced, the talented actress said: “In the UK, 3628 babies were stillborn in 2013, that’s one in every 216 births; a shocking fact I've come to learn during my preparation for telling this story.

“It is an experience that profoundly changes a person's life forever, and we feel a heavy responsibility to tell the truth of this."

She added passionately: “Our hope is that we can encourage people to talk about their experiences and their babies that have died.”

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