Gemma Collins’ warned: ‘You MUST protect yourself from Arg’

As Gemma Collins admits to self-harming and suicidal thoughts in the aftermath of bitter break-ups, Closer’s psychological therapist, Emma Kenny, warns that it isn’t her duty to save her troubled on-again boyfriend, James ‘Arg’ Argent, and says she must look after her own mental health

gemma collins james argent

by Daisy McClure |
Updated on

Fans saw a vulnerable side to the normally feisty Gemma Collins last week, when she broke down in tears and admitted she had contemplated taking her own life after her relationship with James “Arg” Argent ended last year.

Gemma, 40 – who branded Arg, 33, the “love of [her] life” – said she suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder in the wake of their bitter split in July, not long after she tragically suffered a miscarriage.

In the episode of Piers Morgan’s Life Stories – which was filmed before Arg and Gemma rekindled their romance earlier this year – Gemma said through tears, “I would have had the baby with James. I know, obviously, he’s had his struggles, but it is hard… There’s a lot of love there.”

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Gemma gave a searingly honest interview on Piers Morgan's Life Stories ©ITV

Arg confessed to almost dying after a three-day drug binge alone at his home over Christmas 2019 – shortly after, his concerned girlfriend sent an ambulance to his home after failing to get hold of him. He then entered rehab in Thailand for the third time on Boxing Day in order to beat his

Gemma told Piers that Arg’s longstanding addiction to drugs “changed him as a person”, and the breakdown of their on/off seven-year romance left her with suicidal thoughts.

She said, “I have felt suicidal. I think when my relationship broke down with Arg, that affected me. I just thought, ‘I don’t wanna be here any more. I can’t take it.’

“Christmas was an all-time low. I saved his life three times. I had this insatiable love for him. I never wanted to give up on him.”

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the on/off couple have reportedly reunited after a brief split ©Getty Images

It’s not the first time the former TOWIE star’s mental health has suffered after experiencing heartache. Gemma also admitted she resorted to self-harm in her early twenties, after breaking up with a long-term boyfriend and terminating a pregnancy, as doctors said the foetus was “deformed”.

But she explained that her scars were a reminder of how far she has come.

Recently, Gemma and Arg have seemingly reunited, and after the show, he posted a picture of Gemma on his social media feed, writing “so proud of her”.

Gemma previously confessed she had a “weird feeling” she would fall pregnant and get engaged this year. But friends tell Closer that, while she is now “on cloud nine” and looking forward to starting a family with Arg this year, they are concerned it will “destroy her” if he relapses and ruins the happy ending she craves.

A source says, “Gemma has made no bones about the fact she wants a baby and she feels she has no time to lose now that she’s 40. All her hopes and dreams are pinned on this new reunion with Arg. She has spent years of her life supporting him and holding out for him, so she is still scared that he could relapse again. That would cast serious doubt on her achieving her baby dream, and those who care about her worry that would destroy her after everything she has been through for him.”

After his stint in rehab, Arg thanked Gemma for her “tough love” and supporting him through his lowest times.

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Arg made his feelings clear following her interview ©Instagram / real_arg

Yet by July, they endured another explosive split when she published messages in which he cruelly fat-shamed her. Despite claiming their relationship was “over for good”, sources have told Closer that Arg has been Gemma’s “rock” over recent months as her mum and dad recover from coronavirus, which led to them rekindling their romance.

The source explains, “There are two major differences this time around, which is why Gemma thinks it will work. One is that Arg has had a year of therapy to work on getting to the root of his issues – why he feels the way he does – rather than before, where it’s just been about getting clean and healthy.

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gemma and arg together in 2018 ©Getty Images

“Gemma is very spiritual and has also done a lot of soul searching and inner healing. Together, they have built themselves stronger so they are working together and supporting each other, rather than going against each other.

“The second is that Gemma is convinced Arg has re-evaluated his future and he now sees a wife and children as priority.”

Check out: James Argent's weight loss journey from OG TOWIE star to English Channel swimmer

Gallery

James Argent weight loss journey - slider

James Argent - 20101 of 16
CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2010

Arg is an OG TOWIE star and when the series first aired back in 2010 he was in a relationship with Lydia Bright.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2014

James was suspended from the reality show that threw him into the limelight following allegations that he failed a drug test.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2015

The reality star decided to switch up his lifestyle and enter rehab; he even spent Christmas Day at The Priory (the same rehab facility Katie Price spent time in during September 2018). A few months later the reality star revealed on This Morning that it was "the best decision" he has ever made.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2016 (March)

In 2016 after gaining weight, Arg attended two weight loss retreats; one in Norfolk and the other in Ibiza. After his fitness overhaul the TOWIE star dropped from 19st 1lb to 16st. He also went from 48 to 40 inches around his waist.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2016 (July)

Arg told The Sunthat waking up at 6am helped him feel like a "new man". He explained: "I am not going to lie - it has been incredibly tough and, yes, I have had the odd lapse."But I am thrilled to have lost three-stone and I do genuinely feel like a new man."

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2016 (October)

At the end of 2016, Arg confessed on Instagram that he was "gutted at how unfit" he was. However he ended his post on a positive and insisted: "I'll get there and maintain it this time!"

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2017

In 2017 Arg flew out to a rehab facility in Thailand. He spent 10 weeks out there and manages to lose another stone. Arg's friend Jack Tweed revealed all the fitness activities he had been doing during his time abroad."He said he's been doing loads of stuff like Muay Thai boxing, jungle trekking, abseiling down waterfalls and zip lining."He's been eating really healthy food and he's lost over a stone. Arg is in a really good place at the moment and I hope he keeps it up, for his sake and his family's sake," he told new! magazine.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2018

The on-off TOWIE couple (Arg and Gemma) split in July 2018 but then reunited the following month. After getting back together, Arg decided to take a break from the ITVBe show and seek treatment. A source told The Sun: "James was under a dark cloud recently and has made the brave decision to enter back into a programme to help him get back on track."He has been attending regular therapy and secondary care at an outpatient treatment facility in London."

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2019

Despite struggling with his weight, Arg posted a video of the GC snoring and apparently fat-shamed her. It resulted in him being dumped but the pair reunited and managed to move on from the incident.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2019

In April, weight loss professional Steven Miller revealed he was concerned about James Argent's weight and even warned he could be on 'death row'.

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James Argent - 2019

Following the warning the reality star revealed he was taking up boxing to kick start his weight loss. He then vowed on This Morning to take control of his weight after Dr Ranj revealed he was significantly obese, long term he needed to lose 10 stone and drop 17 inches off his waist.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2019

Despite being dumped by the GC earlier on in the year after fat-shaming her, he then appeared to make more mean comments about her figure on her TV show. Fans urged Gemma to split from her boyfriend following his 'disgusting' insults.

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CREDIT: Getty Images

James Argent - 2019

In August as Arg prepared to swim the English Channel for Stand Up To Cancer it came to light that in the past two years he has gained ten stone.

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CREDIT: Instagram / real_arg

James Argent - 2019

Although they didn't swim the entire English Channel, the Stand Up To Cancer team got pretty far before the weather conditions made them cut their journey short. Following his stint, Arg revealed he was heading back to the gym before teasing bigger things are on the horizon in 2020.He wrote on Instagram: "I'm going to have the biggest comeback of 2020!!! "After a few years of absence I'm now officially a member of @davidlloydchigwellofficial My 1st swim ud83cudfca‍♂ufe0f since attempting the epic challenge of the #EnglishChannel Its good to be back! ud83dude4cud83cudffd❤ufe0f".

James Argent - 202015 of 16
CREDIT: Instagram /real_arg

James Argent - 2020

At the beginning of 2020 it was reported that Arg flew out to Thailand and entered rehab following allegations of a 'second overdose'.

James Argent - 202016 of 16
CREDIT: Instagram / real_arg

James Argent - 2020

While flogging curries on Instagram, Arg showed off his impressive five-stone weight loss.

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Arg and Gemma at the NTAs in 2019 ©Getty Images

Recently, Arg revealed he was considering gastric surgery to lose weight and admitted his best pal Mark Wright – who is married to actress Michelle Keegan and has carved out an impressive career as a TV and radio presenter since he starred alongside Arg in TOWIE in 2010 – was a role model.

He said, “Mark is my inspiration. He’s got his life together, he’s fit and healthy, he’s got a gorgeous wife and a successful career. There’s no reason why I can’t achieve all of those things too.”

Closer magazine
Get the best celeb interviews in Closer magazine each week ©Closer magazine

The source continues, “Arg’s peers have grown up and he doesn’t want to be left behind – which is music to Gemma’s ears. Now, they spend quality time together at home watching films, cooking together, having pamper nights and looking at interior designs for her new house – they love it and it’s how they both see their future.

“Arg envies what his friends have now, and he is promising Gemma babies and marriage. She also says that being a dad could be the making of him, too.”

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But Closer’s psychological therapist Emma Kenny has warned that Gemma could end up upsetting herself again if she feels pressure to “save” her partner. She explains, “Gemma and Arg are giving their romance another shot, which is great, but she needs to remember that it’s not her job or duty to ‘save’ Arg. In the past, it seems like that’s what she’s tried to do, and that’s hurt her when it hasn’t worked.

“Arg has spoken openly about his struggles, but this is the first time we have seen Gemma this vulnerable – speaking about suicidal thoughts and self-harming when her relationships go wrong. She must protect herself from suffering like that again.

“What she can do is support Arg’s therapy sessions and his recovery process. It’s great if they do healthy hobbies together, like healthy cooking or walking. But it’s equally as important that she has time out from it too. She needs time for her own self-care and make sure she doesn’t take on the whole burden of Arg’s recovery. She must remember it’s not her job to save him – just to be a support system.”

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