My boyfriend climaxes very quickly during sex. It’s very frustrating and is affecting our relationship. Why does it happen and what can we do?
Louise, via email
Dr Christian says; Premature ejaculation is common, with 10 per cent of men experiencing it at some time. Men who suffer from it last an average of 1.8 minutes before climaxing, while men without it last an average of 7.3 minutes.
Premature ejaculation could relate to early conditioning. Hurried early sexual experiences may condition a man to climax quickly, which can carry on into his later encounters. Anxiety or nerves can also play a part, so try to help him relax during sex.
Local anaesthetic gels that desensitise the penis are available and can be effective, but they would also desensitise you. He could also try wearing extra thick condoms.
Alternatively, he could try the “penis grip” technique, which involves squeezing the glans (top part) of his penis firmly when he is near orgasm – if practised, he could train himself to last longer. He could also try the “stop-start” technique. When masturbating, he should stop just before he ejaculates, let the feelings subside, then repeat this three times before finally allowing himself to come. However, there can be psychological, behavioural and mechanical issues at play, so if the problem persists, gently suggest that he sees his GP or a therapist.