Former lawyer Chris Sevier submitted a 50-page document to the US Court Of Appeals requesting that he be allowed to marry his porn-filled laptop.
In the document, he reasoned that if same-sex couples are free to marry each then he should also be allowed to marry his much-loved computer.
He told a court in Florida: ‘Over time, I began preferring sex with my computer over sex with real women.’
He wrote that if gay couples ‘have the right to marry their object of sexual desire, even if they lack corresponding sexual parts, then I should have the right to marry my preferred sexual object … my porn-filled Apple computer.’
He also argues: ‘The exclusion from marriage to a machine denies myself a dignity and status of immense import.’
Unsurprisingly, the court threw out Chris’s request, with the judge writing: ‘Perhaps the motion is satirical. Or perhaps it is only removed from reality. Either way, the motion has no place in this lawsuit.’
According to reports, Chris’s formal request is his way of raising awareness of the appeal against his home state’s ban against same-sex marriage.