Man charged with rape after having sex with Alzheimer’s-stricken wife: ‘She wasn’t able to consent’

A 78-year-old man stands accused of having sex with his wife, who was in a nursing home and suffering from Alzheimer’s disease

Man charged with rape after having sex with Alzheimer’s-stricken wife: ‘She wasn’t able to consent’

by Kayleigh Dray |
Published on

Henry Rayhons has been charged with third-degree felony sexual abuse, accused of having sex with his wife Donna in a nursing home on May 23, 2014.

The couple married in 2007 after each had been widowed, but Donna was tragically diagnosed with Alzheimer’s just a few years later.

In early 2014, she was moved into a nursing home, with Henry paying his wife regular visits.

Her condition quickly grew more severe; nursing home workers have said that she was unable to recall simple words like "sock" and "blue”, did not know how to eat a hamburger, and often washed her hands in dirty toilet water.

In light of this, staff members told Henry that they believed Donna was mentally unable to agree to sex.

But, just eight days after this discussion, Donna’s roommate told care workers that Henry had come to visit his wife - and had pulled the curtains closed around the bed.

The roommate said she then heard “sexual noises,” according to several reports.

Later, a security camera recorded Henry dropping his wife’s underwear into a laundry basket as he left her room.

Shortly after the incident, Donna was moved to a special dementia facility and her daughter limited Henry’s visits.

He was then arrested soon after his wife’s death in August 2014.

His family released a statement at the time which read: “Donna's location did not change Dad's love for Donna nor her love for him. It did not change their marriage relationship.

“And so he continued to have contact with his spouse in the nursing home; who among us would not?

“Accusing a spouse of a crime for continuing a relationship with his spouse in a nursing home seems to us to be incredibly illogical and unnatural, as well as incredibly hurtful.”

Henry says he doesn’t remember having sex on that exact night, but has admitted that his wife enjoyed and sometimes requested sexual contact.

According to experts on dementia, many Alzheimer’s patients are able to have consensual sex and continue to desire it throughout their illness, much like they desire sleep and food.

There is no denying, however, that their condition can fluctuate, rendering them incapable of sex at one point, but able to agree to it - or even ask for it - at another.

Elizabeth Edgerly, a clinical psychologist who serves as chief program officer for the nonprofit Alzheimer’s Association, said to the Associated Press: “Is the person capable of saying no if they don’t want to do something?”

If found guilty, Henry Rayhons faces up to ten years in prison and a fine of $1,000 to $10,000, according to the Iowa state penal code.

Just so you know, we may receive a commission or other compensation from the links on this website - read why you should trust us