Are we ready for a summer full of sport? Who will take home gold? Who is going to kicked out of the Celebrity Big Brother house FIRST? Grant Bovey or James Whale? What fab family films can we all settle down to after a stressful week?
It's all going on in telly-land.
We've got your ultimate guide to this weekend's TV. You're welcome.
Friday 5th August
Olympics 2016: Countdown To Rio, Friday, BBC, 8.30PM/11.40PM
IT’S TIME!
With just hours to go until the nation goes sports mad and Rio 2016 kicks off, Clare Balding looks ahead to the Olympics in the company of some of the most famous Olympians of all time. Jessica Ennis-Hill, Mo Farah and Bradley Wiggins share their thoughts, and later on this evening it’s the almighty opening ceremony – whoop!
Olympics 2016: Opening Ceremony, 11.40PM
Celebrity Big Brother, Channel 5, 9/10PM
It's eviction night, which means we're about to find out who will get booted out first. Will it be Grant or James? Plus, Emma's bound to drop a little twist on the Borehamwood compound, right?
We.can't.wait.
Friday Night Dinner, Channel 4, C4
Adam has finally been recognized for his musical talent – with an ear-shaped award that “looks like a tumour”. Unfortunately, Jonny rains on his parade by arriving home and announcing that he’s got married, in Vegas (“I’m not a stripper!” announces his new wife.) Will Jackie’s dinner of soup, chicken and crimble crimble even get eaten…?
Saturday 6th August
The Hills Weekend, MTV, ALL DAY
Once upon a time, The Hills was our favourite TV show and the show that inspired TOWIE and MIC. So now, 10 years on (wah, we feel old) the likes of Heidi Montag, Whitney Port, Brody Jenner and Steph Pratt gather host a whole weekend of Hills-themed shows. Woo!
SUPER 8, Channel 4, 9PM
It might not have any stars in in but JJ Abrams monster flick is a kind of modern-day update of classic 1980s kids movie The Goonies. We meet a group of kids who like to shoot films on their Super 8 camera, but while they’re filming one night at a train station, an oncoming train hurtles out of control and causes a huge crash.
Shortly afterwards strange things begin to happen, and it’s not long until the cargo of that train is revealed – it’s an alien that crashed-landed in the 1950s. It’s down to the kids to battle the alien and save the day.
A Fish Called Wanda, ITV, 10.40PM
Time to dust down this classic 80s comedy starring ledges John Cleese and Michael Palin. The two Monty Pythons become embroiled in a diamond heist, carried out by Otto (Kevin Klein) and his lover Wanda (Jamie Lee Curtis). It’s not long before Cleese and Palin find themselves with the loot and the gangsters on their tale.
Sunday 7th August
Dragons' Den, BBC2, 9PM
Ever wondered how much money there is in the pork scratching business? Well luckily dragons Deborah Meaden, Touker Suleyman, Peter Jones, Sarah Willingham and Nick Jenkins are here to help. They’re also crunching some numbers and working out whether a paper-folding device and a fashion business are worthy of their hard-earned bucks.
The Only Way Is Essex, ITVBE, 10PM
All the usual fireworks and dramas. Will Pete and Megan be able to stay out of all the AGG? Probably not...
47 RONIN, Channel 4, 9PM
Yes, there’s much fighting with swords and samurai action, but it’s Keanu Reeves after all and that’s enough for a Sunday night swoonathon. Keanu plays a half-breed samurai who’s set up by an evil Lord, and sets out for some serious revenge.
HIGHLIGHTS OF THE WEEK AHEAD:
Naked Attraction, Channel 4, 10PM
Next up to brave this naked daring show is 28-year-old single mum, who’s been out of the dating game after she split from her fiancée three years ago. She says she has an adventurous side, and she must have to come on a show like this! Next up is 24-year-old mobile phone advisor Matthew, who’s tired of the usual dating apps.
First Dates, Channel 4, 10PM
Call us hopeless romantics, but we’re still as besotted with First Dates now as when the show first started three years ago even if it seems to be on every single week of the year. We’ve just had the glorious celebrity version, but now it settles down back into civilian life. As this new series kicks off, a fresh batch of hopefuls are dispatched off on their quest to find true love, via a quick chat with smooth-talking French Maitre’d Fred Sirieix.
In this opening episode we’ll meet Tourette’s sufferer Damian, 79-year-old history student Joe and 4’10” Ajai, who’s hoping he’ll finally find luurve.
The Supervet: Bionic Specials, Channel 4, 9PM
New series!
Ah, we do love a bit of Supervet (mostly because we’re in floods of tears by the time each episode is over), and the good news is that softly spoken Noel is back for four more specials that delve deeper into the cutting-edge medical procedures he uses to treat his animals. We see Cavalier King Charles Spaniel Molly, who has a tumour on her skull (no!). To help, Noel uses super-modern tech to design a special implant to replace part of the skull he has to remove. Eek!
**What will you be tuning into? Let us know over on Facebook and Twitter (@CloserOnline). **