Valentine’s Day is not even a real thing
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You don’t need to be told to show the person you love appreciation
You won’t have to put yourself in any awkward “love” situations
Instead you can laugh at all all of the other couples cringing at each other in restaurants filled with rose petals
Everyone will be so impressed that you’re so NOT bothered by being single on Valentine’s Day
You are so past breezy, you’re basically a hurricane of breeziness
Think of the money you’ll save… more shopping for you!
And what’s not to love about that?
You don’t have to impress anyone but yourself
Don’t want to get dressed on the dreaded day of love? No problem
YOU can decide what to watch on Netflix
Mushy rom coms? No thank you!
So much more time to be creative and brilliant
Or, you know, time to think about all the food you’re going to eat
More presents for you!
You can pick what you really want for Valentine’s Day. Yay, no more cheap chocolates and tacky flowers!
Like Beyonce, you bought the shoes on your feet, the clothes you’re wearing, the rock you’re rocking, the watch you’re wearing, the house you live in and the car you’re driving. Where my independent women at?
You know, 100 per cent, you DON’T need a man to make you feel good
Preach it, Scherzy